‘What I Feel Toward Him, He Feels the Same Toward Me.’
Gu Feidi asked in surprise, “Why?”
Gu Ruohai explained, “Recently, there have been constant disturbances in our martial arts community. Both Tongyun Monastery and Wujiang Sect found E’Luo Gui Faction’s spies among them. You’re still young. You shouldn’t be involved with this dispute. Just focus your time practicing in the Pavilion.”
“But father,” Gu Feidi urged. “Su Yang transferred the Poisonous Gu into his body to save me. I should not abandon him, all things considered…”
Watching his son’s anxious appearance, Gu Ruohai paused for a moment and asked, “All things considered?”
Lowering his head, Gu Feidi insisted, “...As fellow disciples, the principle of repaying kindness.”
“You and Su Yang are really just fellow disciples?” Gu Ruohai questioned with his deep voice.
He stressed the second half of the sentence with obvious doubt. This made Gu Feidi feel flustered.
He clenched his fists, wiped off the sweat from his palms on his lapel. He swallowed before replying, “Yes, and also…as close friends fighting side by side. During my time in the House of Jade, once at Jade Mirror Lake…and also him protecting me in the wasteland. Father should have been informed of this already.”
As Gu Feidi continued, he finally gathered the courage to raise his head and looked his father in the eyes. “He and I should be regarded as close friends that would go through hell for each other.”
Gu Ruohai stared at Gu Feidi. “Su Yang is important to you.”
Gu Feidi agreed, “A close friend that risked his life for me. He’s very important to me.”
Gu Ruohai slowly exhaled a breath. He raised his hand to pat Gu Feidi on the shoulder. “You’ve grown up…”
Then, without waiting for Gu Feidi to comment, he continued, “I haven’t been a good father or a good husband. When you were young, I neglected you and your mother for a long time.”
Studying his father and seeing the disappointment and frustration, Gu Feidi comforted, “Father, don’t say that. You were strict, but you taught me martial arts and how to read and write calligraphy every day. You cared for me.”
Gu Ruohai smiled. “Whatever the case, you have been a well-behaved boy since childhood. Very sensible and well-mannered, not to mention diligent. You were strict in self-discipline, too. Everyone in the Pavilion praised us, saying how our Tengyun Pavilion has a Young Lord who knows his responsibilities, and there would be hope in the future…”
Gu Feidi speechlessly stood in place.
He dazedly looked at his father, catching the white hair around the temples. The fingers on his side trembled uncontrollably.
“Although Su Yang was born in the Evil Sect, you and he went to the House of Jade. There was bound to be a friendship formed, this was unavoidable.” Gu Ruohai sighed. “That year, this father…also befriended the Evil Sect’s Leader. When I was young, we travelled around the Jianghu together.”
Then, with another faint sigh, he fixed his eyes on Gu Feidi and shared, “But you have to understand that sometimes, many things don’t develop in the direction you expected. As a father, I don’t want my son to go down the same path and experience the same pain as I did.”
Gu Feidi was stunned. “...Pain?”
Gu Ruohai sneered, “Let’s not mention the past. You’ve to know that people in the Evil Sect are absolutely unrestrained. They ignore human emotions and act according to their desire. Now that he treats you well and is willing to lay down his life for you, but it doesn’t mean that he won’t leave you for another.”
He stopped for a moment and sincerely and earnestly wished, “You’ve feelings for him, but remember to also protect yourself.”
This one sentence was a complete shock to Gu Feidi.
With a panicked expression across his face, he clutched the corner of his sleeve and said in a trembling voice, “...Father?”
“Do you love him?” Gu Ruohai asked with a bitter smile. From the firm tone, this was simply a rhetorical question.
Gu Feidi was tongue-tied. He bit his bottom lips and refused to break eye contact.
He tried to quibble. “He and I are both men…ho-how could I love him?”
Gu Ruohai sighed and didn’t continue the topic.
“Return to the Flying Bird Residence to meditate. I’ll arrange for Feng Lin to take Su Yang to the snowy mountain.” He said calmly. “Some time ago, Lingyun came back and caused a big scene. She is staying in the Cloud Residence for seclusion and reflecting on her mistake as punishment. You can go visit her.”
Gu Feidi’s eyebrow slightly furrowed. “Why did father punish Xiao Shimei?”
Gu Ruohai countered the question, “You really don’t know?”
“Is…is it because of Fan Xi?” Gu Feidi answered. “Just because he was born in the Qinglian Sect? Father doesn’t think the Sect is worthy of our Pavilion and does not approve of Xiao Shimei associating with him?”
Gu Ruohai inquired, “When did you start trying to see things from my point of view?”
Gu Feidi clenched his fists to force himself to calm down.
Gu Ruohai exhaled. “I punished her because she was being thoughtless and was incited by a man. She was willing to elope with that man. It’s more dangerous for women to be out there than men, not to mention the criticism she would face from eloping. This burden would be harder on her than Fan Xi. My worry is not the family background, whether it’s Qinlian Sect or the Evil Sect…Do you know why?”
Seeing that Gu Feidi was still frowning, he ended the conversation helplessly. “It made no difference, you’ll understand once you become a father.”
Gu Feidi seemed to want to object, but he quietly closed his mouth.
“Go rest.” Gu Ruohai smoothed. “I asked the servants to prepare red bean cake and osmanthus sweet wine, but don’t eat too much, we’ll have fish from the river for dinner.”
“Father…” Gu Feidi whispered. “...There is one more thing.”
“Go on.”
“In my time at the Evil Sect, I met their Leader.” Gu Feidi took out the letter from his robe and handed it to his father with both hands. He resumed, “He asked me to deliver this letter to you.”
His father’s eyes landed on the handwriting on the letter and slowly moved to the branches of green bamboo signed in place of the writer’s name.
Time passed for a long while, there were no other movements.
Gu Feidi lifted his head suspiciously, but he couldn’t see any emotion on his father’s face.
Gu Ruohai snapped out of it when a crow suddenly cried outside of the window. He reached out to accept the letter from Gu Feidi.
“You go back first.” He mumbled.
Gu Feidi nodded and hurriedly withdrew from his father’s room.
When he came out to the courtyard, he turned back to glance at the highly moral man that stood as tall as a mountain, motionless in the mall hall.
…
That night, Su Yang didn’t sleep very well as restlessness was haunting his heart. He would wake up even if there was no noise around.
As the sky brightened, he turned over to get up. His face didn’t hide how tired he was. Instead of tossing and turning, he decided to catch up on sleep at noon.
When Mei Shisan brought breakfast, Fan Xi finally woke up.
He hugged his quilt and gazed at Su Yang with a confused expression. After realising he wasn’t hallucinating, he jumped up from the couch.
“You really came to the Central Plains!” Fan Xi exclaimed.
Seeing the clothes on Su Yang, his eyes widened. “Gu Feidi has brought you back to Tengyun Pavilion?”
Su Yang murmured, “No, he went home to deliver a letter and I’m waiting for him here. After that, we’ll go to the southwest together. But you and Pu Lingyun don’t seem to be having an easy time…”
Fan Xi said with a bitter smile, “I won’t call it not an easy time, he didn’t give me any time. I don’t know what I should do now. Ling-er had also sent a message back to Tengyun Pavilion but received punishment. I don’t know if he has scolded her. I pleaded for a meeting with the Wulin Alliance Leader, but all I got was a door shut in my face…”
“Alliance Leader Gu doesn’t approve of your relationships with her?” Su Yang asked worriedly.
“Of course he disapproved of it.” Fan Xi replied dispiritedly. “Qinglian Sect is, after all, just a tiny sect. We were known as a sect standing on both sides. Or better yet…all of the Jianghu call us opportunists. You should have heard of it before.” He laughed bitterly.
Fan Qi was unhappy. “Brother, how can you destroy your ambition like that? Now with our elder brother helping our father out, things would only be better and brighter!”
Fan Xi sneered, “Elder brother? There’s nothing to benefit from being on both sides in the Jianghu. He thinks that our Qinglian Sect can become a gold treasure that everyone likes…”
Su Yang already didn’t have the heart to listen to the internal quarrels of the Qinglian Sect. The longer Gu Feidi was away, the more worried he became.
If Alliance Leader Gu couldn’t even approve of the Qinglian Sect, there was even less of a chance for the Evil Sect’s Young Master…who is also a man. How could he get the approval and live a long and happy life with Gu Feidi?
He knew that even in modern times, this would be a bitter pill for the family to swallow. Also, the culture here in ancient times made one’s gender more important because of their task of continuing the family line for generations and generations. The indulgence from the Evil Sect’s Leader made him too relaxed. He didn’t notice that he and Gu Feidi had arrived at the foot of the high mountain that had to be climbed.
—Plus, he even decided not to accompany Gu Feidi to Tengyun Pavilion. He completely threw all the pressure on Gu Feidi...
“Hey! Jianghu to Su Yang!” Cried Fan Xi suddenly.
Su Yang snapped out of his thoughts and tried to comfort himself, Everything will be okay. Gu Feidi is just going home to deliver the letter. He doesn’t have to confess anything to his father right now. So there is nothing to worry about…right?
“Let’s stop talking about this depressing subject.” He curled his lips. “Breakfast first. Then what’re your plans for later?”
They sat down at the dining table, and Fan Xi answered, “I have to go back to my place to clean up, then I’ll go to the Tengyun Pavilion’s main pavilion to present my request for a meeting, and work in the afternoon.”
Su Yang was flabbergasted. “Work?”
Fan Xi sighed, “What else? I have stayed here for over twenty days already. The money I brought with me is already gone. If I don’t work, should I wait to be a beggar on the street?”
When money was brought up, Su Yang realised that he never paid attention to their spending expenses. So he instantly turned to Mei Shisan.
Mei Shisan reassured, “There is nothing to worry about, Young Master. We have enough money and a deposit with the Central Plains bank. We can withdraw the money anytime with your official seal.”
Fan Xi teased with a smile, “Young Master, you’re really royalty. Never need to worry about money.”
Fan Qi’s face was puzzled. “Er…Young Master?”
Fan Xi exclaimed, “What? Didn’t you two know each other? Are you telling me you didn’t know Su Yang is the Young Master of the Evil Sect?”
Fan Qi: “!!!”
Fan Xi completely gave up on his younger brother. “...Are you stupid or what! You didn’t know who he was, and you allowed him to take me back to his room? With no inquiries?! What if he planned to chop me up and toss me into the river in pieces?”
Fan Qi argued, “I don’t know him, but I know his sister!”
Fan Xi was fuming. “From where?! Su Yang is an only child!!”
Fan Qi was suddenly confused and turned to ask Su Yang, “But I saw a woman a few days ago. She looked just like you…like…”
The more he said, the quieter his voice became. But his mouth kept getting wider as if he figured something extraordinary out.
It startled Fan Xi. He examined Su Yang suspiciously and reworded his brother’s question with uncertainty, “Did you really…disguise…”
Su Yang was completely not ashamed. “That’s right, I disguised myself as a woman.”
Fan Xi’s eyebrows went up high. He was full of questions and interest.
But Fan Qi, on the other hand, was opposed to that. “Wh-what? What? That woman…that woman was you?!!”
Ignoring one of Fan Qi’s collapsing views, Su Yang consoled Fan Xi, “If you really need it, I can lend you some money first.”
As for whether his friend should pay it back or not, he would not say a single word.
Fan Xi refused, “No need. I want to rely on myself to take root in this city and go to the main pavilion every day. I need to toughen myself! Ling-er grew up here. She has had no worries about food and clothing since she was a child. I can’t bear her suffering with me.”
Su Yang lifted his hand and patted Fan Xi on the shoulder. “Your words are beautiful. Why did you drink yourself silly like that yesterday? I thought you became a drunkard because your road to love ended horribly.”
Fan Xi grinned. “I was in a bad mood yesterday. I just happened to have enough disposable income on hand, so I drank more than usual, and happened to run into you.”
Then, he rubbed his chin and studied Su Yang for a long time. “How about you? Gu Feidi went back to his Pavilion and I don’t see you worrying to death. I’m afraid it would be more difficult for you and Gu Feidi once his father learns of your relationship…”
Su Yang was stunned and asked, “How did you…”
Fan Xi winked at him. “I’m just speaking as a person who has personally experienced it. Yes, I didn’t notice the intimacy between you two riding on that white steed in the wilderness at first. But after careful consideration, I naturally realised it.”
After a pause, he whispered, “You and he are both men, standing on opposite sides as well. If he doesn’t have the same feeling towards you like you do…Young Master, there won’t be anyone that would stand by your side.”
Su Yang smiled brightly. “We feel the same toward each other.”
Why do feel like feifei will be also imprisoned & then he’ll elope with his wifey.
Thnx translator & editors for this beautiful translation ❤️❤️